new video/performance/music

While I was at my mother's over the weekend I played with the thunder tube, exploring the range of sounds you can get from it. You may know the instrument - it's a hollow tube with a disc of plastic at one end, with a long spring attached. When you shake the tube it makes a noise reminiscent of thunder. It also has phenomenal amplification if you just, for instance, scratch the spring.

I was confident of being able to generate a set of material from this, so went online and ordered myself one. That arrived yesterday, and I spent time playing with it. Then I started doing other things and forgot about it.

A little later I could overhear some talent show centred on oversinging bland songs with all the ersatz emotion your quivering little body can generate playing in the next room. It reminded me of the way that contestants sometimes take songs and crush all nuance, uncertainty and intelligence out of them - making bludgeoning anthems devoid of meaning.

By an alchemy I really have no explanation for - well, other than I'd been watching George Kuchar's Hold Me While I'm Naked - two thoughts occurred to me simultaneously. One was that it might be interesting to strip off and video myself rubbing the sharp edges of a can lid over bits of me. The other was that Turn this into a power ballad, you fucks! might be a good title for something.

Setting up the camera and recording the performance was the first job. With that out of the way I uploaded and edited the video. The sound as it stood was unusable, so I turned to the thunder tube.

Since I knew how long the video was all I had to do was record three short improvisations slightly longer than that, edit them together, check they sounded okay, and slap them over the video. Add titles and you're done.

Some of it was a little more involved. Fixing the camera required duct-taping its tripod to a mic stand, and marking the area of  floor that would be in shot. The performance took a couple of rehearsals and one abortive run-through to get right. And even then for the section with my face I re-did it after the first attempt. In the editing I trimmed what I didn't need and placed the two scenes - scraping my face and my genitals in the reverse order from how they were filmed.

By contrast the audio was easy. The three improvs fitted together with only minimal editing - basically snipping out the opening clunk of switching on, and finding a sensible place for each to finish.

So, if you're old enough to watch age-restricted videos with flaccid dicks being threatened by sharp metal, you can see the whole thing below. Don't try this at home.


Or for those who'd rather not see my junk, just the audio:


Various edits to tidy up, add links, and embed the video/audio.

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